My journey of STPM: A bad start

This is my own story on how I survived through this one and a half year of STPM. I hope that my story can encourage those who wanted, or already on the way of studying STPM to thrive harder in their studies.

Flashback #1, 9th November 2013:

ME: I swear I will NEVER STEP INTO FORM SIX NO MATTER WHAT! Who wants to suffer in this one and a half year while your efforts may be proven futile?

Dad: Daughter, our family isn’t as rich as your other classmates. Please be considerate about our family’s financial conditions. I know, with your SPM results, you can go anywhere that you want, but with the savings that we have right now……

Flashback #2, 20th March 2014:

Add Maths teacher: Congratulations on your results! So do you plan where to further your studies?

ME: If I am able to get JPA scholarships for studying overseas, definitely I will go for that. Or if I got matriks offer, then I go. If come to the worst situation, I will go for A-levels. But I will not take on STPM. It’s hard. Even seniors who scored during SPM also having a hard time there.

Add Maths teacher: I am also STPM graduate and A-levels are also similar to STPM, but it’s more expensive. So why wasting your parent’s money? If you take on STPM, you will be a more matured person and you will have a clearer path later on. STPM is also a test of your real ability. If you can survive through STPM, then you are really strong in academics.

ME: But I wouldn’t want to take the risk……..

Add Maths teacher: There are some risks that we ought to take during our whole life. Without risking, we wouldn’t do our best to be successful in life.

Flashback #3, 24th April 2014:

It’s already 12am!! Time to check whether I got matriks offer or not!

My heart was pounding hardly and full of excitement when I tapped on the keyboard of the smartphone screen.


I prayed to Lord Buddha that I got offer for matriks. Please, let me get this offer……

Maybe Lord Buddha didn’t hear my prayers this time. The reply message after a few minutes had really made me heartbroken:

“Harap maaf. Anda telah gagal.” (Translation: Sorry, you failed)

I curled up my body at a corner of my room, with tears rolling over my face.

5th May 2014:

Well today is the first day I stepped into another school environment. Since I failed to get matriks offer, I was automatically offered a place to study STPM at Malacca High School. It’s just a 1 and 0 between matriks and STPM.

It’s quite irony for me to study Form Six because I swore that I would never go back to school life ever again. I admit, jealousy had once aroused when I saw most of my peers are doing well at matriks college or showing off photos of them at the airport, preparing for departure to overseas.

Since the offer letter only stated us to dress appropriately during the first day of school, I just wore a blue shirt with jeans. Immediately after registering at the foyer, I was called up by the school’s counselor because of my improper attire. I was so embarrassed!

I met some of my friends from other schools who shared the same fate with me. We mingled with each other before the orientation program started.

Since it was a reminiscence of events happening two years ago, I remembered vaguely how the school principal welcomed us with a two-hour speech, and briefing in every subjects by the form six teachers respectively.

I listened tentatively, and when comes to choosing subject packages, without any doubt I picked Physics Stream over ICT stream. ICT stream seems lucrative for me, since it offers Arts Subjects as one of the electives. But I chose Science instead because I believe I can do well in science subjects too, with my study options more open later on.

Even though the main idea of briefing was already blurred in my mind, however some of them are still vivid:

“If you are not prepared, you will die in this endless war.”

“Persistence and Consistence will contribute to your success.”

“If you want to score in STPM, then don’t ever think of repeating the papers, because it will increase your study burden even more”

“Don’t let your past disappointment haunts you, Don’t let your past glory stumbles you.”

Anyways, we spent our orientation week with rehearsal for group performances. My group was so passive that even our seniors was so fed up with us. I came with an idea of acting a drama. I prepared the script, while the other members took on the acting role. We got a third place in group performance though 😛

After school, my senior approached me: Hey! So have you chosen what stream are you entering?

ME: Yeah I have chosen Physics Stream.

Senior: Then you must be in Alpha Class already!

ME: Ha? What is Alpha Class?

Senior: Aiyah you will know later! Bye! See you tomorrow!

To be continued…….


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