19th Jan 2018: Shock

After having lessons at Engin, I met my junior who is interested to become a RA (Resident Assistant). I explained to her about the jobscopes and roles of a RA, and secretly did a small mock interview on her, so that I can gauge her strengths and weaknesses in case I want to write a recommendation letter if she’s interested in it. But I  think I kinda conveyed a lot of negative messages (but I kept it neutral already) to her… ^^lll

Okay that’s not the important part of this daily prompt.

I received a message by my Resident Advisor (RAD in short) to have a one-to-one meetup tonight. Upon receiving this message I was really afraid, because recently I kinda screwed up things in ordering food for upcoming event in my residence, and I thought she’s gonna question me on my underperformance. I desperately searched in Google, and even called my mum on how to face her later on.

But I was shocked when she told me this:

“I’ve heard from Madam Usa that you had a hard time last year right?”

Initially I tried to sound okay, and having the attitude of “the past is the past already”, but when she asked me further, the scar in my heart started bleeding again. She listened to my rants, and she attempted to help me as much as she can. In the end we had a discussion on what can I do next.

She told me that our relationships shouldn’t just be limited to merely work matters. She told me she wanted to make sure that I am part of the family, I am belonged to this team. Perhaps I didn’t want to involve unnecessary people inside my personal affairs hence I kept it from them. I felt grateful for my RADs because they gave me a form of emotional support despite me stuck at the pit of despair. At the same time, I felt guilty as well because I mistook her intentions.

via Daily Prompt: Shock

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